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tv   The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon  NBC  April 28, 2017 11:34pm-12:38am PDT

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people parked there like a parking lot a. crime scene near the 92 interchange. getting to san francisco or the san francisco bridge is very problematic at this hour. this is northbound 101. they are hoping to reopen the freeway within the next hour. we are going to keep our crews on the grounds level. we'll also keep our chopper up for you and monitor this on our website and twitter feed through the night and into our morning show which starts at 7:00 a.m. >> let's hoping it is opening at midnight. jeff says it's going to be sunny. enjoy the weekend. >> good night. thank you for joining us. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> steve: from studio 6b in rockefeller center in the heart of new york city, it's "the tonight show starring jimmy fallon." tonight, join jimmy and his guests -- martin short, britt robertson, jessica seinfeld,
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and featuring the legendary roots crew. >> questlove: 664, montserrat, yeah! >> steve: and now, here he is, jimmy fallon! ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you. ♪ ♪ >> jimmy: oh please. welcome, welcome, welcome. enjoy yourselves. welcome, everybody. welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome. welcome to "the tonight show," baby. [ cheers and applause ] that's what i'm talking about. beautiful crowd tonight. beautiful new york city crowd. welcome, everybody.
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well here's what people are talking about. tomorrow is president trump's 100th day in office. [ cheers ] and in the new interview, trump said that he thought being president would be easier than his old life. [ laughter ] people don't know what's more shocking, that he thought being president would be easy, or that he thought his old life was hard. [ laughter and applause ] i guess yelling, "you're fired" from your apartment is hard. in the same interview trump actually stopped to hand out electoral maps that show which states he won during the election. [ laughter ] then he said, "i colored them myself." [ laughter and applause ] good for you, you're very talented. keep walking. trump also says he misses a lot of things he used to be able to do, like driving. then he said, "but i also miss putting and everything. it's amazing a week away from golf, i just miss every aspect." [ laughter and applause ] but this is true. trump said he does, he misses
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driving. it turns out trump, i didn't know this, he's actually a a pretty big car guy. >> steve: really? >> jimmy: yeah, take a look at this video he just put out. >> this is donald trump and i absolutely love automobiles. especially these fantastic automakers like chevrolet, bu-mwa, lamb in a bikini, meatball sushi, ashton kutcher, and my personal favorite i sue you. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: it's interesting. >> steve: wow. >> jimmy: meatball sushi. >> steve: wow. i sue you. he does not know how to pronounce those names. >> jimmy: lamb in a bikini, yeah. he loves cars. >> steve: he loves them. >> jimmy: to mark his 100th day in office, trump also did an interview with fox news. trump was so excited to be on fox news, it was like when a a kid goes to disney world and gets to meet all his favorite characters. [ laughter and applause ] "oh, my god, sean hannity! hi, sean hannity. tucker carlson!" [ laughter ] that's right, tomorrow is
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trump's 100th day in office. so instead of giving you a full review of everything that's happened so far we decided to put together a little montage that focuses on the key words from trump's presidency so far. i hope you enjoy this. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ 100 days so let's review trump can't get his agenda through ♪ ♪ health care bill absolutely no immigration reform remains in limbo ♪ ♪ border wall no funding at all trump willing to ♪ ♪ delay it until this fall so it's early it's positive he is following through on ♪ ♪ his campaign promises by nominating a justice neil gorsuch ♪ ♪ ♪ you are fake news nothing to do with russia knock knock [ horn honks ] first 100 days ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: strong handshake. >> steve: yank that arm. pull it out of the socket. >> jimmy: let's get to some
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sports here. last night was the start of the nfl draft. that was exciting. [ cheers and applause ] right? the cleveland browns had the first pick or as they put it, "crap, that's tonight? oh my goodness. [ laughter ] who's the biggest guy?" and this is kind of interesting, i saw the dallas cowboys drafted a player named taco charlton. [ light laughter ] of course, taco isn't his given name. his given name is cheesy gordita crunch charlton. [ laughter and applause ] that's right. there's a defensive end named taco charlton, marking the first time a taco will be stopping some runs. >> steve: oh! hey! [ laughter and applause ] [ rimshot ] [ cheers ] going to a bowl. >> jimmy: hey, i want to say happy birthday to willie nelson who turns 84 years old tomorrow. willie, baby. [ cheers and applause ]
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and if you forgot about it, don't worry, because so did he. [ light laughter ] so, it's all good. speaking of marijuana -- [ laughter ] get this, i saw that disney world has added marijuana to its list of prohibited items. then parents are like, "you mean, we could have been high this whole time? [ laughter and applause ] just now -- we -- what?" [ applause ] here's a local story. i saw that a brand new, state-of-the-art public restroom just opened behind the new york public library. [ scattered applause ] it replaces that old public restroom, the new york public library. [ laughter and applause ] that's the new thing. and finally, after their big scandal a couple weeks ago, united airlines says it will give passengers up to $10,000 if they agree to give up their seat. [ audience oohs ] which backfired when the pilots were like, "sweet, see you guys later, 10,000 bucks, let's go."
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[ laughter and applause ] we have a great show tonight, we do. give it up for the roots, baby. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ >> jimmy: oh! [ cheers and applause ] did you hear that again? >> tariq: another soul clap. >> jimmy: i'm not. tariq, i'm not making it up. our crowds are the coolest crowds in the world. [ cheers and applause ] they did it again. >> they did it again. >> jimmy: they did it again, normally the roots play -- ♪ [ clapping along ] everybody is like -- yeah. that's not what you guys were doing. you were going -- let me hear the beat again. ♪ >> jimmy: i mean, that's fantastic. [ cheers and applause ] the soul clap! >> steve: soul clap. >> jimmy: it is soul clap
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fridays here at "the tonight show." welcome back. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] we've got a great show tonight. ♪ we love this man. ♪ he's hilarious. ♪ martin tall, no. ♪ martin short is on the show! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] martin short. >> steve: one of the funniest humans on earth. >> jimmy: he might be the funniest human being on the face of the earth. >> steve: ever made. >> jimmy: plus she stars in the new netflix series "girlboss." britt robertson is dropping in as well. [ cheers and applause ] "girlboss." >> steve: "girlboss." >> jimmy: and our pal, she is the author of the great new cookbook called "food swings," jessica seinfeld is stopping by! [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: hey-oh! hey-oh! >> jimmy: we're going to catch up with jessica and then we're going to do a fun food experiment with some of her recipes. >> steve: ooh. >> jimmy: where i use my taste buds. [ light laughter ] to tell what -- what is -- what -- >> steve: only your taste buds. >> jimmy: yes.
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>> steve: no other senses? >> jimmy: we're going to remove some of my senses. [ laughter ] guys, as you know i interview celebrity guests on my show every day. well there's someone who has been doing it a lot longer than i have and i have a lot of respect for him. his name is jiminy glick. [ light laughter ] and he is known for -- i know, some people think he looks like a heavier version of martin short. [ laughter ] >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: he's known for asking celebrities and politicians a a ton of hard-hitting questions that most hosts are afraid to ask. well i watched his most recent interview last night, and i gotta say it was pretty intense. so i thought i'd share it with you. please enjoy jiminy glick's interview with the president of the united states, donald j. trump. please enjoy. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> hello i'm jiminy glick and i'm here with former reality star, bankrupt casino owner, and the 40 -- the 40 -- the 45th president of the
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united states. difficult one to utter. donald j. trump. how are you, mr. president? >> jimmy: thank you jiminy. i'm a big fan of your work. tonight's gonna be fantastic. >> oh, i'm so excited to see you. let me shake your hand. look at these. this hand, it's like five cocktail wieners attached to a a ham hawk of some form. i think -- and i don't want to use this inappropriately. but this is what we call circus stuff. you are such a handsome man. >> jimmy: thank you, jiminy. thank you. >> you look like if dennis the menace made a bunch of bad life choices. but still -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: thank you. >> now your first 100 days, would you say it's a complete embarrassment or a total failure? [ laughter ] i know you're very concerned about leaks and so am i. i'm actually been leaking for the last 20 minutes. [ laughter ] no really. i'm wearing an adult diaper and i swear to you, right now, it weighs 75 pounds. [ laughter ] if you could deport one of your kids -- >> jimmy: eric. >> wow.
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not an ounce of hesitation. interesting indeed. if mike pence is against gay people, why does he walk around with a stick up his ass? [ laughter ] besides ben carson, can you name another african-american? >> jimmy: george foreman grill. [ laughter ] >> let me understand your education. it was not extensive is it? it's a limited education. do you not feel that even words that are simple should be said properly? say china. >> jimmy: jina. >> china. >> jimmy: yina. jina. >> say chitty chitty bang bang. >> jimmy: jitty jitty bang bang. >> say gynecologist. >> jimmy: jynecologist. >> okay. unbelievable. this is absolutely terrifying. it's now been 100 days since you've seen melania. where is she? where does she go? [ laughter ] she's in hiding. >> jimmy: if i ever see melania again i'll ask her. >> okay.
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this is like -- it's like a a 4-year-old walked in lost, and i took his hand and i said "mama, is mama around, because this is not a normal" -- if this is any indication i can't believe there's five children in the -- [ laughter ] now chris christie, do you still see him? >> jimmy: it's hard not to see him. >> because he's so fat. if anyone should make fun of heavyset people it should be you. >> jimmy: thank you. >> you've met vladimir putin. what does he taste like? >> jimmy: vladimir putin is a a great guy. he's a fantastic guy. really, really personal, charming, and i've never met him. >> but you have, again, a a vocabulary of six or seven words. >> jimmy: thank you. >> do you ever want to add another one like "the." >> jimmy: duh. >> say the, the -- it's really something. >> jimmy: duh. my god you're a handsome man. not many people can pull off a a moat that look likes a cat's butt-hole as it walks away from you. why do you squint so much?
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is it because you don't see what you're doing to the country? i want to ask this, you had this wonderful dinner at the white house with sarah palin and kid rock. >> jimmy: that's right. >> and how did you get them over? did you phone them up or did you just burn a whole bunch of tires and let the smoke signal them? >> jimmy: don't you love kid rock? >> i love kid -- i love kid rock. >> jimmy: isn't he fantastic? >> and ted nugent. >> jimmy: ted had some very great ideas. have you ever seen or heard of ted talks? >> that's ted nugent? >> jimmy: that is. >> what do you -- >> jimmy: i could be wrong. i could be wrong. >> it's time to eat. would you like to have something? [ laughter ] [ choking sound ] >> jimmy: are you choking? are you choking? you are choking. [ choking sound ] what's -- what are you doing? >> sometimes when i'm choking
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more food helps. [ laughter ] you know what? i'm gonna -- speaking of north korea. >> jimmy: kim jong-un is a very dangerous man. >> he look likes a bouncer in a a lesbian bar doesn't he? [ laughter ] well so much fun. mr. president, let's do this again. i want to talk to you in 100 days from now. after the impeachment. [ laughter and applause ] this has been jiminy glick. and i'm so honored to be sitting with the commander in chief of our wonderful nation. donald j. trump. what does the j. stand for? >> jimmy: genius. [ laughter and applause ] >> very good. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: my thanks to jiminy glick for a in depth interview with the president. stick around, we'll be right back with martin short! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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♪ ♪i'ma wade, i'ma wave through the waters♪ ♪tell the tide, "don't move" ♪freedom! freedom! i can't move ♪freedom, cut me loose! ♪freedom! freedom! where are you?♪ ♪cause i need freedom too! ♪freedom! freedom! freedom! freedom!♪ ♪what you want from me? ♪is it truth you seek? oh father can you hear meee...ooow?♪ is thno, it's, uh, breyers gelato indulgences. you really wouldn't like it. it's got caramel and crunchy stuff. i like caramel and crunchy stuff. breyers gelato indulgences. it's way beyond ice cream. ♪ we are not here to observe, to sit idly by, or watch from the stands.
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♪ [ cheers and applause ]
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>> jimmy: jiminy glick. you guys, i love you guys. thank you so much. >> steve: oh, my god. >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. guys, today is friday and that's usually when i catch up on some personal stuff. you know i check my inbox, i return some e-mails and, of course, i send out thank you notes. and i was just wondering -- [ cheers and applause ] i was running a bit behind today, so i thought if you guys wouldn't mind, i'd just like to write out my weekly thank you notes right now. is that cool with you guys? [ cheers and applause ] you guys are the greatest. james -- james, can i get some thank you note writing music please? ♪ [ laughter ] >> steve: wow. >> jimmy: oh, he's in a -- he's in a good mood this week. >> steve: today, yeah. [ light laughter ] tgi friday, man. >> jimmy: good lord. [ light laughter ] looks like he's wearing kwame's pocket square. [ laughter ] >> steve: oh! ♪ hey-oh! deep cut! >> jimmy: thank you, treasury secretary steve mnuchin, for
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letting me know what would happen if ross geller hooked up with mclovin. there you go. [ laughter and applause ] ♪ thank you, starbucks new dragon frappuccino, for looking like what came out of me after i tried the unicorn frappuccino. >> steve: ho! [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: why? >> steve: why? >> jimmy: why do we keep trying new things? >> steve: no. ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, people wearing trench coats, for basically saying, "i'm expecting some rain and possibly a mystery." [ applause ] ♪ thank you, astronaut peggy whitson, for speaking to president trump via satellite this week. when asked how much longer she'd stay in space, she said
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i'll probably hang out until 2020 or 2024, depending on what happens. [ cheers and applause ] why did she say that? >> steve: i know, that's a long time. that's a long time in space. ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, counting sheep as a cure for insomnia, for letting shepherds know we find their job very boring. [ laughter and applause ] that's rude. >> steve: rude. >> jimmy: that is -- >> steve: rude. >> jimmy: that is rude. how dare you. fred. fred? how dare you. [ slapping ] [ laughter ] good day to you, sir. [ slapping ] [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ]
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♪ ♪ everybody was kung fu [ laughter ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, umbrellas, for keeping about 15% of my body fairley dry. [ laughter ] not worth -- not worth it. >> steve: no. ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, the potential writers strike, for -- sorry, there's nothing here. please don't strike, please. please don't strike. [ applause ] please don't strike. [ applause ] ♪ thank you, wildlife refuge in kenya, for setting up a tinder account for your endangered rhino.
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he must be pretty horny. >> steve: ho! hey! [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: those were my thank you notes. we'll be right back with martin short! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ and let roomba help with your everyday messes. a full suite of sensors automatically guides roomba throughout your home. cleaning under furniture, along edges, and in corners. and roomba's patented 3-stage cleaning system agitates, brushes and suctions dirt from your floors for up to 2 hours, recharging itself when it needs to. which means your floors are always clean. you and roomba, from irobot. better. together. hey, l'eggo my eggo. i don't see your name on it. really? ba bam! know the rules. keep your eggo.
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, my goodness. our first guest is a very funny, very talented man. he's currently on a 40-city comedy tour, with the also very funny and very talented, steve martin. upcoming dates are sunday may 21st at the ohio theater in columbus, ohio. friday july 21st, starlight theatre, kansas city, missouri. friday august 11th concord pavilion at concord, california. there's one in rochester hills, michigan -- i'm booking the whole tour. >> steve: are you really? >> jimmy: please welcome our good friend, the always entertaining martin short,
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everybody. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you for having me. ♪ [ cheers ] >> jimmy: martin short! oh, my goodness. >> thank you -- thank you so much. >> jimmy: oh, my goodness. there he is. martin short, everybody. i'm embarrassed that we almost went -- we almost thought it was over. >> i almost thought it was over. [ talking over each other ] >> jimmy: welcome, welcome to the show martin short. >> thank you so much. you know i can't stay long. [ light laughter ] i can't. >> jimmy: you just got -- >> no, no, i know i did. but i -- i left my uber driver waiting. >> jimmy: oh. [ laughter ] >> and you know how testy bill o'reilly can get, you know. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: [ inaudible ] martin now. now marty. [ cheers and applause ] >> put that down. poor bill.
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you know, his problem was, he thought "harass" was two words. [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: hey-oh! oh! ♪ >> thank you so much. >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. >> good to be here. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: we love having you. >> you are hilarious tonight. >> jimmy: we love having you -- thank you. >> i love your monologue. oh, my god. how brave are you. [ laughter ] no really, to do an entire monologue and not worry about any reaction from the audience. it's a -- it's an intriguing new approach to show business, i think. >> jimmy: but the audience loves you. we love you. i mean, i love you. they go nuts when you come. >> oh, thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you look -- you look fantastic. >> oh, thank you. well you look sensational. [ cheers ] no, really. i've never noticed this before but you -- in person, you look like a slightly older version of kim jong-un. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yes. >> just -- just a little more moody. that's all. [ laughter ] no really, i mean you got -- you got donald jr.'s face and ivanka's figure, i mean, it
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works on you. >> jimmy: oh, thank you so much. [ laughter ] i appreciate it -- 'cause i know you watch the show. >> kylie jenner lip plump is working. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: yes, it is, a little bit. thanks, i appreciate that. >> yeah, no, really, your whole vibe is very -- you know, honey boo boo's mom after the weight loss. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah. [ laughter ] >> steve higgins. i love you steve. >> jimmy: you love steve higgins. >> oh, my god. he looks to me like the world's most jovial undertaker. >> steve: oh. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: so nice and thoughtful. >> steve: oh, my gosh, how sweet can you -- [ talking over each other ] oh, my gosh. >> well, anyway i'm -- i'm thrilled to be here. >> jimmy: i -- i wish you could be here more, but i know you live in l.a. but we would have you on every single night. >> oh, please. no i -- listen, this show to me it's like a united flight with games. >> jimmy: thank you. [ laughter ] thank you again. i appreciate all of this. >> oh, i was -- i was on that flight. >> jimmy: were you really? >> yes, i was. i was so furious. >> jimmy: yeah. >> 'cause they dragged that guy
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right through first class and it knocked my arm. my champagne went everywhere. [ laughter ] i mean that is unacceptable. [ laughter ] you can't -- you can't drag a a guest. >> jimmy: no. that is not true. >> although southwest calls it an upgrade. [ laughter ] actually that's what they do with trump, each morning, they just drag him like that into the white house. >> jimmy: into the white house. that's how gets there -- he doesn't want to leave mar-a-lago. >> i -- well, yeah. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: i love -- i love reading your book, and i did not -- i must say, it's called "i must say: my life as a a humble comedy legend." >> yes. >> jimmy: and it's a great book, it's a great read. but i did not know, it's also an audio book. >> yeah, yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: i didn't know -- i can't hear higgins with the audio book, because it's fantastic -- i would love to hear your voice as well. >> i don't read it. sharon glass from cagney and lacey reads it. but -- [ laughter ] in retrospect, i probably should have read it. >> jimmy: you probably should have. i mean, you have a great delivery. no, but you -- i want you to tell the story about how you -- you thought of maybe a
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a different career, one not in show business. >> yeah. i was not going to be -- i was going to be a doctor. >> jimmy: that's right. >> and i went -- it was in two years in premeds, until it suddenly hit me that i didn't care about science, you know. [ laughter ] i just liked the way the scrubs fit around the crotch, you know. but -- [ laughter ] you know, that -- that can be enough. but i -- i never -- i used to -- i was so far behind in my anatomy class, 'cause i was always doing plays. you know, ♪ what's a nice like you and other students were actually going to class. so i -- i was behind in my anatomy class and it was all tied to dissecting a cat and knowing every, you know, organ and every tendon, so i went and stole a cat. >> jimmy: this is real? >> yeah, this is true. stole a cat out of the freezer, of mcmaster university in the middle of the night, took it home, 'cause i had to dissect it all night, 'cause the exam was the next day. and my poor cat -- my real cat was 17, tiger -- [ audience ohs ]
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and she came into the room and, you know, this is the world's fattest cat, she was -- the worms in her stool had type two diabetes. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that is -- that is -- >> she smelled the formaldehyde -- and ran. but i -- i used to do -- i was two years. i would do rounds with the doctors, you know. >> jimmy: you really would. you would get around in theater and -- >> oh, it was terrifying, yeah. i mean, i remember one time, it stayed with me all my life, this great doctor, doctor gosai, and this really happened, i was like, you know, 21 or something, and he -- there -- there's this young man had been -- he was like 25 and he had been in a car accident and shattered his jaw. and they had to wire his jaw closed and -- and he was saying -- he said, it's going to be wired. doctor gosai said it's going to be wired for six weeks. he's like, "how will i live? how will i eat?" and he said -- the doctor said, i'm going to use simplistic terms because i don't want to
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lose you, but -- [ laughter ] he said, you'll have to be fed through the back door, he said. he said, "fed through the back door?" it's the only way you can eat. you have very small veins. so, they couldn't do it that way. so they -- he said "well, i am kind of hungry. i missed lunch. what's for dinner?" and they said, "roast beef, a a baked potato, broccoli and hot chocolate." he said, "well, might as well do it." so we flipped him over, and they put a funnel type thing in his -- in his back door. it's true. all true. and the doctor said, "what do you want to start with?" and he said, "i'll have the hot chocolate." and they poured the hot chocolate in the funnel and the guy went, "ah!" [ laughter ] and they -- and the doctor said, "too hot?" he said, "too sweet." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's a true story.
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>> all true. >> jimmy: it's a true story. martin short is on tour with steve martin "in the evening you'll forget for the rest of your life." go see him. he's amazing. martin short, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] we'll be right back with britt robertson. stick around, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ with my moderate to severe crohn's disease,... ...i was always searching for ways to manage my symptoms. i thought i had it covered. then i realized managing was all i was doing. when i finally told my doctor, he said humira was for people like me who have tried other medications,... but still experience the symptoms of moderate to severe crohn's disease. in clinical studies, the majority of patients on humira saw significant symptom relief... ...and many achieved remission. humira can lower your ability to fight infections... ...including tuberculosis. serious, sometimes fatal infections and cancers,...
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♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hello, and welcome back everybody. you know our next guest from films like "tomorrowland" and nicolas sparks' "the longest ride." she currently stars in the brands new series, "girlboss" which is streaming on netflix now. ladies and gentlemen please welcome britt robertson. ♪ [ cheers and applause ]
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>> jimmy: welcome back. welcome back to the show. >> i have never been here before. >> jimmy: you've never been here. >> no. >> jimmy: i meant welcome back to the audience, but you -- >> oh. >> jimmy: i was actually -- i was talking to marty. >> jimmy: i want to talk about "girlboss." >> okay. >> jimmy: this is a big deal on netflix. i'm very intrigued about this whole story because you play -- it's loosely based on a true story? >> very true. >> jimmy: yeah. the loosely based, or the true part? >> loosely based. both. we sort of go back and forth between like a fictional version of sophia, and then like true events that actually happened to her, and then kay cannon, our creator -- >> jimmy: kay cannon, who i know from -- >> who is the best. >> jimmy: marty, you must know from "30 rock." >> marty: yes, she's brilliant. >> jimmy: and she also wrote "pitch perfect." >> yeah, both of them i think. right? yeah. >> jimmy: this girl that you play is sophia amoruso. she started this thing -- just started selling vintage clothing on ebay. >> ebay. >> jimmy: and making like, a a three-thousand percent profit. >> yeah. >> jimmy: something like that. >> pretty crazy. >> jimmy: is that right? >> yeah, no, it's right. you're good. >> jimmy: yeah, you're good. that's what you're acting like.
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>> no, no, no, you're so dumb. you're so stupid. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: but then she ends up doing -- making a website called nasty gal or something. >> nasty gal. it's based on a bette davis song that she liked and then she named her like ebay account nasty gal vintage, and then later her store and like her whole like, you know, clothing thing is nasty gal. >> jimmy: forbes said that it was worth like 300 million dollars. >> at one point she -- like made more money than beyonce i think. someone told me that. i don't know that that's real, but someone told me that. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no, i believe that. >> kind of cool. >> jimmy: it think it is, yeah. i mean, of course it's real. >> of course she makes more money than beyonce. >> jimmy: she's girlboss. >> yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: but then she wrote a a book called "#girlboss." >> that's right, and that's the new brand girlboss. >> jimmy: girlboss is the new brand. >> girlboss is in. nasty gal is out. >> jimmy: wow. >> i just said that. i don't know that that's true. somebody's probably going to -- >> jimmy: well, who wouldn't believe you? >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: you're here. we have to believe you, but i'm very interested about this because i've only seen the first episode. >> okay. >> jimmy: which i love, and i know one of the writers jake fogelnest. >> yeah, he's awesome. >> jimmy: he's a great guy, really funny guy. i know him from "snl," and also
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he's on xm, he's on sirius xm. >> really? >> jimmy: oh, he's a fantastic radio -- >> oh, no way. i mean, he's very funny and he has like a very quirky sense of humor which i like. >> jimmy: great musical taste too, ask him about music. but, also charlize theron is -- >> the producer, yeah. >> jimmy: come on. >> i know, i know. >> jimmy: marty. marty, stop it. marty. >> sit back down over there. [ inaudible ] >> jimmy: marty. >> marty: what! what! >> jimmy: no interruptions tonight. >> marty: no scrubs tonight. >> jimmy: she -- charlize, she must be super fun to work with. >> she's super fun. >> jimmy: does she take care of you. >> she does -- yeah, she really takes care of me. at one point, like early on in the process, she like gave me her number, and her e-mail and she was like reach out. but i feel like when people do that, and especially if i have no reason to contact her then, you know, i shouldn't be calling her. that was just like a courtesy, right. you know like, i'm your boss. if you need anything hit me up. and at one point i tore my
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groin like running the golden gate bridge, and i didn't call her, and then she was like, i gave you my number, and i gave you the e-mail so that you would call me when these things happen and then she had to like fly into san francisco. she was very upset. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: wow. marty, all you have to do to get her attention is tear your groin. >> tear your groin. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: he's into it. he's into it. he -- look at him. he's thinking about it. >> marty: wow it just dawned on me. >> that's perfect for you. there you go. >> jimmy: i want to show everybody the clip, is there anything you want anyone else to know about this? here's what i like about this "girlboss" because you guys had the idea, had the book, and then kate cannon, one of the hottest comedy writers out there -- you pitch at other networks, the networks were like, too edgy for us. >> can we make it a boy boss. i think that was the main note. that they'd love it to be like a boy boss. >> jimmy: they did. right? >> yeah, yeah, but it sort of defeats like the whole purpose
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of the story. >> jimmy: no, girlboss. how could they -- the story -- what are they talking -- >> and i wouldn't have a job right now so that would have been very -- >> jimmy: hello. i mean. oh, my god. but i thought it was cool and it's like. >> she really fought for it she fought for the idea and -- >> jimmy: it's and edgy -- it's a different character -- especially to be one of the main leads, and i think you're doing a great job. >> thanks. >> jimmy: we have a clip, here's britt robertson in "girlboss." check this out. >> i want this. >> i'll give you 8 bucks for it. >> no way, the tag says 12. >> well, i only have 8. >> i think you're lying. >> why. >> you have shifty eyes. >> thank you. >> i'll let you have it for 10. >> 9 bucks, and i'll give you some free business advice. >> deal. so. what's the advice? >> this is an original 1 1970s east/west cat skin motorcycle jacket in perfect condition. know what your [ bleep ] worth, cause you just got played. bam son. >> jimmy: oh! [ cheers and applause ] britt robertson, "girlboss." it's streaming on netflix now.
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we'll be right back with jessica seinfeld, everybody. come on back. congratulations. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] tired of paying hundreds more a year in taxes and fees on your wireless bill? only t-mobile one gives you unlimited data with taxes and fees included. that'll save you hundreds. get two lines of unlimited data for a hundred dollars. that's right. two lines. a hundred bucks. all in. and now, the brand new samsung galaxy s8 is here. so what are you waiting for? get the new galaxy s8. plus get 2 lines of unlimted data for a hundred bucks. taxes and fees included. only at t-mobile. hey, l'eggo my eggo. i don't see your name on it. really? ba bam! know the rules. keep your eggo. l'eggo my eggo. okay.
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our next guest is the founder and president of the amazing good plus foundation, as well as a three-time best-selling cookbook author. her latest book "food swings," is in stores now. ladies and gentlemen, jessica seinfeld! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you so much. thank you for being here. congrats on the new cookbook now, "food swings" not mood swings, "food swings." tell me what it's all about. >> i wanted to create a bible for people to shut down that ongoing battle in their brains about what they want to eat versus what they should eat. >> jimmy: oh, trust me. >> yeah. it's endless for so many people. >> jimmy: i know, i know. >> this, with two chapters, virtue and vice, you can live between the two covers. >> jimmy: and you actually are using this. you said you do this. you do four times a week, virtue. three times a week -- >> i try but then some weeks i'll do six nights a week vice, and one night virtue.
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so you need vice to have virtue, and you need to have virtue for vice. so i feel like just -- instead of a clean eating program which i could never do. >> jimmy: no, i have tried. i do it for a week and i'm really grumpy. that's the end of it. >> no -- i'm a hateful person. >> jimmy: i would rather just gain weight. >> and i know that there's a a huge chocolate cake at the end of the week. so when you know you can play between the two sides, it's just a little bit more relaxing on the brain. >> jimmy: just from the cover itself, which i love, i love the doughnut and broccoli, and i went and i made broccoli doughnuts. [ light laughter ] >> oh. yum. >> jimmy: i just thought -- you want to give it a try? >> that looks great. >> jimmy: yeah. just try this, yeah. sure. what do you think? what do you think? is it bad? [ laughter ] is it bad? ♪ oh, my god.
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is it awful. >> no, it's so good. [ laughter ] it's amazing. >> jimmy: it smells like broccoli. but did we make it sweet or something. >> it's really unique and good. [ laughter ] yeah. it is. >> jimmy: i don't know why i made you do that. all right. i don't know why i made you do that. that was really bad. it tastes like broccoli. okay, you would think it would be sweet like a doughnut. >> am i all green? >> jimmy: oh no. you look great. all right. let's skip over that and get to some real recipes. sorry about that. i want to try some of your recipes but i want to try an experiment here. i've heard that your sense of taste becomes heightened once you take away all other senses. so we're going to test it right now. higgins, do you want to help me out with this. higgins here is going to take away all of my senses so i can really taste each one of your dishes as closely as possible, and try to guess exactly what is in them. all right. here we go. let's do this. all right. >> steve: napkins, there you go. >> jimmy: thank you very much. >> steve: eyes, sense of sight gone. sense of hearing. gone.
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[ light laughter ] >> jimmy: okay. okay. okay. >> steve: smell. >> jimmy: ow. alright, that hurt. alright, i'm ready. are we starting? [ light laughter ] sorry about that. >> steve: we're going to start. >> jimmy: i can't hear anything. >> describe it. >> jimmy: i'm just guessing what the food is. why do i need headphones on? all right. [ laughter ] >> steve: so you can't hear the food. eat the food, i'm gonna put it in your mouth. >> jimmy: okay. >> steve: i lost the war on vice. >> this is avocado with strawberry and lemon and salt and pepper. >> jimmy: i don't like this game. i don't know what's going on. what am i doing again? >> steve: i'm going to put food in your mouth. >> jimmy: what was that? like a grilled cheese or something? >> steve: no. >> jimmy: it was like toast or something. >> steve: yes. yes. that's perfect. >> jimmy: and was there something on the toast. >> steve: yes. >> yeah. >> steve: well, take a look at it. >> jimmy: oh gosh, this is the weirdest game. >> steve: avocado. >> jimmy: wait, it's strawberries? >> steve: yes. >> yes. >> jimmy: how would i guess
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that? >> steve: it's okay. alright, ready for the next one. >> okay. >> steve: blindfold. >> jimmy: here we go. [ laughter ] >> steve: all right. okay. this is going to be two different things. >> jimmy: strawberries and avocado. >> steve: wrong. >> this is sweet and spicy pork ribs with jalapeno cornbread. >> steve: okay, ready for the second one. [ laughter ] come on. put it in your mouth. >> jimmy: this feels like -- >> steve: come on! >> jimmy: it's a plate. >> steve: come on. >> jimmy: feels like "fifty shades of grey." i do not like this at all. what is this? >> steve: just taste it. >> jimmy: i'm not doing this. i'm not doing this. >> steve: just try it. >> jimmy: i know. >> steve: it's a rib. you love ribs. >> jimmy: i don't want you to feeding it to me now. the game's not fun if i'm staring at you. >> steve: no, here's the deal. >> jimmy: it's too verbal. it's too loud. i don't understand what this
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part is. >> steve: that's the sense of hearing. >> jimmy: that felt weird. i feel like we're making jessica uncomfortable. >> steve: we're making america uncomfortable. >> i was fine until "fifty shades of grey." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: here, you try it. [ cheers and applause ] you try it. all right. ready. i'm going to plug your -- yeah hold on. >> steve: you're going to do what? >> jimmy: i'm going to plug your nose. you can hear me. >> steve: i can't hear you. i can't hear you. >> jimmy: the headphones aren't on. >> steve: i can't hear anything you're saying. >> jimmy: open wide. open wide. here you go. how does it taste, man? [ laughter ] there you go, right there. that was my broccoli doughnut. [ applause ] give it up for jessica seinfeld. "food swings" is available now. stick around. we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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quote
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♪ >> jimmy: fantastic. this is a vegan ice cream? >> yeah. >> jimmy: what is in this? >> just peanut butter, bananas, cinnamon and nutmeg. >> jimmy: oh my gosh, fantastic. guys there's all sorts of cool recipes in this. "food swings" is out right now. martin short, thank you. [ cheers and applause ] britt robertson. jessica seinfeld, ladies and gentlemen! [ cheers and applause ] steve higgins. and the roots right there from philadelphia, pennsylvania. [ cheers and applause ] i'm not feeding you. stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers." thank you for watching. have a great weekend. hope to see you next week. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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♪ ♪ ♪
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[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it's "late night with seth meyers." tonight -- jake gyllenhaal, comedian whitney cummings, music from post malone, featuring quavo and metro boomin, featuring the 8g band with charlie benante. ♪ ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: good evening, i'm seth meyers, this is "late night." how is everybody doing tonight? [ cheers and applause ] fantastic to hear. in that case, let's get to the news. the house did not vote on the republicans' obamacare replacement bill today as expected. i guess they wanted to keep obamacare until they can get this suspicious mole checked out. [ laughter ]

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